" I had a sculpture teacher tell me that if you were working on something that it might be good to work on it as a series of evolutions of the same theme or image. She didn't say it exactly like that but it was pretty close.  I'm thinking that's good advice for what I'm writing now. Maybe I should copy them each with the changes that the previous written one had inspired. Then print them. Hang them on the wall like rays of the Sun coming from that very first poem. Would be interesting to see how it evolves.

Or stays the same."

me @ 2am, 3-9-11

I'm having trouble sleeping. Part of it's the weather. It's starting to get "blowwy" outside. The wind is really picking up. Rick told me tonight that it was supposed to be bad weather again. Later today maybe there'll be tornados to watch for. Then there's the dreams. I haven't talked to mom and dad since last Thursday evening. I left them there in a kind of strange place. I don't know - I dread - the possibilities of later today. I've been sleeping trying to rest incase the news isn't good. Incase there's a part of something sad coming. But when I try to sleep, I dream. They're telling dreams. Telling me this or telling me that. I don't rest in those dreams and when I surface from them I'm exhausted. It's as if I've not slept at all.

So this morning I'm just fighting sleep and writing. 

I so wish that Writing Buddy was here in someway. Writing Buddy used to tell me that they read my blog to be calm.  I made them a Zen Garden. A place to be and to write in peace. Funny but I'm thinking that I could use a Zen Garden of their making. I miss the hellos and that feeling that there was someone in the world who was true to their word.

I need that right now.

I need someone to talk or not talk to about what's going on in my life.

Someone to hold my hand or be there in someway so that I wasn't alone.

Someone to care and notice if I was gone.

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