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"...I turn on the car radio and there's this ad for a restaurant. The owners were celebrating their anniversary, 9 years today, and offering everyone who came to eat free cake. They wanted to share their wedded bliss and I guess get everyone in listening distance to think good thoughts about their life choices. Then, in what was really interesting programming, the radio station played the song "Chasing Cars". LOL, yeah, that was my reaction too. WTF. The song is all kinds of emo and, after hearing the very jolly commercial about marital bliss and fried chicken, the song just jarred me awake.

And it got me thinking about the oxymoron - "marital bliss".

You see personally I think that husbands and wives should get things like hazard and longevity pay if the marriage lasts 9 years. They should also get separate vacations if they so choose. For a week, of their choice, they should get to go somewhere with their best friend. Now if that best friend is also their spouse? Great. But for most folks the day end and day out just wears them down. Add kids and the economy and it gets worse. You need a vacation from these people so that you don't yell at them the other 358 days out of the year. And you should take your best friend so that you don't have to eat and drink alone if you don't want to. If you make it past 25 years? You should get a month off. Somewhere far from the person who on average is okay but alot of times just pizzes you off.

Bonus if you've raised kids or lost your job(s) or bought/sold a house or dealt with an illness.

I'm sorry but that anniversary night dinner or the anniversary weekend is like a drop of water to a person starving for drink (or a conversation). It just gets your hopes up and then makes you cry for the lacking of it..

"Marital Bliss"

There's just no way that everyday is bliss in marriage unless you just ignore, give in, or take really good drugs. Or you're lucky.  Bliss is that feeling of euphoria that you get as a result of being exposed to something that is purely pleasant. Marriage might be two people sticking it out but it's not bliss.  Definitely an oxymoron..."


*from Life. A Work In Progress by c anne ford

all rights reserved by the author






To borrow from Benjamin Franklin, if that sun is rising or setting will depend on the determination and understanding of the people involved...


I was listening to that song, Chasing Cars yesterday and it got me to thinking about how it's possible for two people to live together for a long time and not eventually hate each other. The song sounds like a long time where the two folks don't want to end it but they've had it. Like the last mile of some marathon.


I believe in love with eyes open -  and sometimes shut.

"...If I could just hold you for this one second. Look to my right or left while I sit here and ponder what to do next and there you'd be. If I could just - if I could just .  I would have that feeling that I had from the moment I saw you and it would be okay. There's so much to tell you. It's that feeling when your feet hit the dock after a long while traveling.  You're full of stories of the trip but more you're near bursting with the desire to sit there with the someone of your heart and tell them what's happened.. But you aren't here and I can't tell you or ask you what you think.

"Is that love?" I ask.

Then for a bit I can "see" you and "hear" you in my mind's eye. You're there and you tell me what you think. We were together so long that I could always tell what you thought. It was never boring to me this predictability. It was a comfort in a world that had long sense gone crazy with the heat.  No matter what happened, I knew that you'd be there and I say to you, "Well here's the day." and you'd sit there listening. Then you'd ask me what I thought I should do or not do and I'd tell you.  Then you'd tell me.  Then we'd sit there in the kitchen table and not say much until the whistle went off and you got up to get it.

I was never one for the excitement of back and forth debate. Just the quiet and you confidence that I could handle my own...."

from

Life. A Work in Progress

by C anne Ford 
all rights reserved by the author.





This is a long post.

WB will be here soon. He's going to bush hog some. We had to wait a bit and now it's like hay. Pup's going to help him not because he needs the help but because Pup needs to help. I hope that makes sense.  I've got laundry to wash.  The animals are already fed and watered. I think that we'll eat chicken and then maybe watch a movie.  Maybe get some ice cream.


I'm not so much sad as a bit nostalgic. It's overcast and the prediction is for rain. That's why WB is going to bush hog this afternoon instead of tomorrow.  "Gotta' make hay..."  you know.

Since the last bit of this is more like a letter than a blog post, I'll sign off as if this was a letter to you, Gentle Reader.

Kind thoughts and good happy to you. Hello and hugs to the family.

Ann

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