Wednesday, December 22, 2010

merry, merry, and happy too


I know that this isn't the most likely of Christmas carols but - well - Christmas is about hope and people.

I've been lucky.

There have been some lovely days. Good mornings that have been pure bliss.

Then there were the other days.

The dark ones after my son died.

One morning in particular. I remember saying to myself, "Get up." I didn't want to get up. So there I stayed. Drained of all but the pain of loss.

"Get up."

I'm not sure if those words were mine or if there was some higher force telling me that if I stayed in that bed? I might founder.

So I got up.

Life is interesting and good now. The pain will always be there. Some days it's a small ache and still there are days when something will come up bringing back the pain fresh. Now I know to get up and walk. Go call someone. Give the hug that I need to someone.


This Christmas is the first one that I've actually felt what I thought I'd lost long ago.

The wonder of Christmas.

It's been a long road to this.

And to think that it all started with a laugh.

Merry Christmas to all and a blessed coming year.